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August 30, 2005

My Movie Twin

After six plus months traveling the world, my friend Kate returned to the U.S. with a new career aspiration in tow: writer. Her first project will be an autobiographical novel, which will of course, sell millions of copies, go through multiple print editions, and inevitably lead to a big blockbuster Hollywood movie (screenwritten by me).

The fun part was deciding who would be cast as all the important people in her life. For herself, she decided on Jennifer Connelly. Casting myself - a rare big screen species known as "Asian" - was much more difficult.

During the past two years, I have been told that I look like the following celebrities:

(Yes, that's Robert Smith of The Cure.)

While this movie is still far, far away, any casting insights would be greatly appreciated.

Posted by Michele at 09:39 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

August 25, 2005

Always Angry, Violent Customers. Always.

This afternoon, one man was shot in an Albuquerque Wal-Mart after stabbing a woman in the store. Earlier this week, a man opened fire in a Wal-Mart parking lot outside Phoenix, killing two employees.

Why are Wal-Mart customers so angry? They get the cheapest prices on consumer goods, and that's without Rollback. Their stores are always well-stocked with the most essential home items and hottest fashions - yeah Faded Glory! You can even buy niche products, like craft supplies and firearms. Ah yes, firearms.

If I were to be killed in a superstore, I think I'd choose Home Depot. Everything you need for a proper burial is already there.

Posted by Michele at 11:21 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

August 22, 2005

Top Ten Songs

Just shy of a fortnight ago, I got "tagged" by Dan. The assignment:

“List ten songs that you are currently digging … it doesn’t matter what genre they are from, whether they have words, or even if they’re no good, but they must be songs you’re really enjoying right now. Post these instructions, the artists, and the ten songs in your blog. Then tag five other people to see what they’re listening to.”

Despite being a lifelong music fan and record company employee, I had trouble completing this task. It seems that over the past year or so, I've lost my mojo for discovering new music. Moreover, much of the new music I seem to find is of the...err...country sort. I have no idea why this has happened, but I do recognize I need a music intervention. Consider this a cry for help!

For now, I present my Top 10:

1. Hot Hot Heat - Middle of Nowhere
2. Fountains Of Wayne - Karpet King
3. Shooter Jennings - 4th of July
4. Foo Fighters - Best Of You
5. Handsome Boy Modeling School - The World's Gone Mad
6. Gwen Stefani - Cool
7. R. Kelly - Trapped in the Closet
8. Ben Lee - Catch My Disease
9. Kaiser Chiefs - Everyday I Love You Less & Less
10. The Spinto Band - Trust Vs. Mistrust

Abby, Jackie, Cootie Girl, J, and Jana - tag, you're it!

Posted by Michele at 11:22 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

August 16, 2005

He Looked Good. He Looked Fine.

Just Diddy, ma'am. Just Diddy.

Posted by Michele at 11:55 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

August 10, 2005

Hot for a Killer...I Guess

I tend to think there is a little bit of good and evil in every human being; it's the balance of the two that differentiates us from one another.

Most people in this world are majority good; even a cynic like me holds that tenet to be true. There are a select few, however - maybe 1% of the population - whose balance of evil is so gut-wrenchingly atrocious, that traces of good can only be found in their physical form.

That said, I've compiled a brief list of the most attractive and charming murderers of the past half century. Before I get bludgeoned with insults, heed this as a safety warning to all: just 'cause yer a looker, don't mean yer sane.

1. Scott Peterson: The most obvious choice. Looks like Dean Cain minus the tights.

2. Lee Harvey Oswald: So young & innocent. He could've been something if it weren't for that whole presidential assassination thing.

3. Ted Bundy: The most dangerous of ladykillers, Bundy was intelligent, charming and suave. And a Republican.

4. Jeffrey Dahmer: Name a psychopathic problem and this dude was afflicted with it. Cleans up well.

5. O.J. Simpson: This former Heisman trophy winner was so smooth, he convinced a jury he was innocent!

Posted by Michele at 11:33 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

August 09, 2005

Trailer Park Diet

I'm sitting here at my computer eating Bagel Bites for dinner, reflecting on all the horrible foods I used to eat as a child. Before you cue the violin, please note: for the most part, I had a well-balanced diet growing up. Artificially-colored cereal and soda were no-nos in my house until I was a teen, and my mother, an excellent cook, made nutritious dinners just about every night.

Lunch, however, was not her specialty, especially on the weekends. I guess everyone needs a break.

Here's a brief list of my pre-pubescent lunch diet:

Ramen (usually Oodles of Noodles brand; Oriental flavor of course)
Ellio's frozen pizza
Steak-Ummms
SPAM - raw, not cooked
English muffin pizzas with ketchup, not pizza sauce
Microwaveable cheeseburgers and fries
Kraft Mac & Cheese with extra parmesan

I have no idea why I now have high cholesterol.

Posted by Michele at 10:33 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

August 08, 2005

Peter Jennings (1938-2005)

I'll miss his candor, journalistic integrity, sweet soul, and good looks.

Visit the American Lung Association's website to learn more about lung cancer and/or to make a donation.

Posted by Michele at 01:24 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

August 01, 2005

Spoiler Alert (Oops, Too Late)

I was so relieved to see the ill-fated Nate Fisher croak on Sunday's episode of Six Feet Under. Over the past few seasons, he's done nothing but lie, cheat and argue; his drama becoming more mundane and predictable with every episode; his misery second only to Jesus in The Passion of the Christ.

With only 3 more episodes to go, I'm thinking more carnage is in order. My prediction: Crazy Billy and mad-as-a-hatter George end up in a Fisher funeral showdown, fighting to the death. Neither of them dies, but a stray bullet accidentally kills George's pregnant daughter Maggie and her unborn Fisher baby - which of course, Rico discovers in the lab.

Meanwhile, David and Keith, the only really likable characters on the show, live happily ever after with their two new adopted sons.

The end.

Posted by Michele at 10:32 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack