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May 20, 2004
Holy Mother F@#%er!
In order to best understand the severe horror of this entry's subject matter, we need to first take a quick glimpse at rapper/actor Ice-T's career:
Late '80s: Ice-T enters the rap scene as a hardcore O.G. Gangsta, who openly raps about his drug dealin' past and screwin' women with inanimate objects. Ya know, normal stuff.
Early '90s: Ice-T appears in the critically-acclaimed-only-by-me urban crime movie, New Jack City. Later, Ice and his band Body Count get villianized by conservatives for their controversial song "Cop Killer."
Late '90s: Ice-T joins the cast of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit as Det. Odafin "Fin" Tutuola. Law & Order being the same franchise that revived Jerry Orbach's career.
...And NOW (drumroll please)...Ice-T has just announced that he will be producing David Hasselhoff's new hip-hop album. Yes, you read correctly: Ice-T, Hasselhoff, hip hop album. The only thing these two have in common is the propensity to surround themselves with juggy blondes. Wake up Ice, THIS IS RIDICULOUS!!
Posted by Michele at 05:02 PM | Comments (3)
May 17, 2004
Goodbye Jimmy on SNL...Hello Jimmy in Forgetful Crappy Movies
Once upon a time, I used to be a Jimmy Fallon fan. Remember how cute it was when he used to do his dead-on Adam Sandler impersonations? Ahh, the good days.
Boy, how things change! Over the past two seasons or so, he's morphed into "the bad hair, then not so bad hair, Weekend Update/Boston Red Sox fan guy who can rarely complete a scene without laughing hysterically at fellow annoying cast member Horatio Sanz." And sometimes he's been so snarky, it's been downright painful.
Nevertheless, I was shocked to see Jimmy Fallon announce this weekend that he was leaving SNL after six seasons, without any sort of sendoff "hype." Maybe Friends stole his NBC glory?! I'm puzzled why he would make such a move in the first place. He's had no major film roles to-date (not even a bad one - see "Superstar"), and he seems to be pretty comfortable as Lorne Michael's resident bitch.
Forget Jimmy for a minute though...What's going to happen to SNL? For the first time in SNL history, the female players are much stronger than the males players - a rare occurrence for this famed boys club. It looks like Lorne's going to need to make some big cast changes next season to avoid another late night comedy drought.
My advice: Go catch up on Mad TV for awhile.
Posted by Michele at 05:11 PM | Comments (5)
May 13, 2004
Me No Likey McDonald's
May is Asian Pacific Heritage Month, and there's no greater way to celebrate than by visiting McDonald's new "I Am Sam"...oh I mean..."I Am Asian" website.
If you aren't easily offended and want a laugh, I recommend taking a minute to browse through this site. The copy is horrendous, but not nearly as pitiful as the Asian & Pacific Islander Americans Who Have Made A Difference links. Click on the 50 most inspiring Asian Americans of all time link, and watch it magically
While the intentions behind this McAsia site are good, I think a simple gesture - like making "Sweet & Sour" the official McD sauce for the month of May...or offering a Chicken Teriyaki sandwich special - would've sufficed.
Only one question remains: Where are all the Asian protestors? Now that the Details' Gay Or Asian? fiasco has ended, there's room for a new attack. Bring it!
Posted by Michele at 02:43 PM | Comments (0)
May 11, 2004
And There Goes The Marketing Plan...
The queens of Wal-Mart and direct-to-video sales are experiencing failure for the first time with their box-office bomb New York Minute. Despite opening in 3,000+ theaters nationwide, it grossed a measly $6M opening weekend. (Just to give you an idea how awful this is, the Tina Fey-penned Mean Girls opened the previous weekend in 167 less theaters with a $24M debut.)
I'm not sure what this means for the twins'...ahem, Mary-Kate & Ashley's...future in film. But I wouldn't be surprised to see some form of reality TV show in the coming year.
Posted by Michele at 11:40 AM | Comments (2)
May 10, 2004
A Man For All Seasons
Most people hope to marry maybe once in their lives. Udaynath Dakshiniray of India, however, hopes to marry 100 women by the time he dies.
Alas, do not judge! It appears that Udaynath is on a social mission to help unmarrried women climb up the social ladder. Each woman he marries receive 5 acres in land.
Is that so bad? Does anyone else miss the days of dowry?
Posted by Michele at 01:56 PM | Comments (3)
